And here I am years later, still waiting for the punchline.

To be honest, I don’t think the governor has any idea what he’s doing.

You can try to burn the evidence but it’ll always linger in the air, in your lungs, your very being.

Is there a difference between porridge and oatmeal?

Never one to cause trouble, I won’t bring up the fact that you’re sleeping with her daughter.

“Shake Well Before Using and Refrigerate After Opening” – but what if you’ve got no fucking hands, man?!

It’s a hard fact to face but some day Roy Orbison will die.